The Mission of Missions (aka. Impossible)
by BurChan
Summary: Okay, one of my saner stories i wrote with my friend via. email. Anyway the charaters are Navi-chan, Pika-chan, Squall, Headless Chicken, Bon Jovi, and Britney Spears
1. Lord save us

Yeserday my band went on a mission. A mission to find the golden... er... something. No..wait no i remeber! We went on a mission to find a golden apple. So we climbed the mountain and I said yay. Boy, we sure didn't have fun, Pikachu and Fujin kept yelling at each other......  
  
Fujin: SHUT!  
  
Pikachu: Pika!!!!! *shocks Fujin*  
  
Fujin: UP!  
  
.....and that stupid faerie, Navi, urgh! She DOESN'T shut up!.....  
  
Navi: *flies up hill* HEY! LOOK! LISTEN!!!  
  
Pikachu: Pika!!!!! *shocks Navi*  
  
Navi: *flying still, alittle bouncy though* H-HEY!!! LOO-OK!!! LI-ISTEN!!!  
  
So anyways, we (Fujin, Pikachu, Navi-chan, Britney Spears, Bon Jovi, Squall, and a headless chicken) were on a quest to find the golden apple. It was a long....wait let's start at the begining...when there was Navi- chan...........  
  
Navi-chan was stupid on a day (*sings*which is every day... sorry [most people won't get that, unless you like Ani DiFranco]). She flew into a wall.  
  
Navi: Hey! *hits wall* OW-Look! Listen!  
  
Fujin: IDIOT!  
  
Navi: HEYLOOKLISTEN! *hits Fujin on head* HEYLOOKLISTEN!!!  
  
The band continued on their conquest after that Alford momment (Mr. Alford was the 6th grade social studies teacher, he's crazed!), and happened to stumble.........  
  
pika-chan: *falls down a mountain* PIKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
..........upon a kupo nut crazied moogle pack, down a valley.  
  
navi-chan and britney spears: *really bad country* *yelling also* WAY DOWN SOUTH WHERE MAH GARDENS GROW, MY VALLEYS FLY AND JUMP REAL HIGH-!  
  
Fujin: HELL?  
  
Bon Jovi:...........*sings softly* it's mah life and it's now or never...i ain't goina live forever....  
  
(Navi-chan overs hears Bon Jovi singing)  
  
Navi-chan: IT'S MAH LIFE....BA BA BA BAH! (Navi-chan likes this)  
  
Everyone cept Navi-chan: *sweatdrop*  
  
Fujin: ONWARD!  
  
Squall and the headless chicken had said nothing up to this point. However, leadership being his area of expertise, Squall decided to speak up. The headless chicken remained silent.  
  
Squall: Right now I'm on the verge of agreeing with Fujin.  
  
Navi-chan: NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!  
  
Fujin: REALLY?  
  
pika-chan: *whispers* that's gonna be the first time.....  
  
Suddenly, Pikachu had the urge to hop up on the stump and start rapping.  
  
Pikachu: I'm Pikachu yes I'm the real Pika all you other Pikachus are NOT Pikachus so won't the real Pikachu please stand up? please stand up? please stand up?  
  
Squall: *shakes head*  
  
They then continue down into the village. Millions of moogles come running out to get their vistors.  
  
Moogles: Welcome! Kupo!  
  
Navi-chan: HEY! LOOK! LISTEN! YOU CAN USE THE "ACTION" BUTTON TO SPEAK MOOGLE SO YOU CAN FIND OUT WHAT THOSE MOOGLES ARE SAYING! KUPO!  
  
Squall: Action button my ass.  
  
Squall grabs Navi and sticks her in a marmalade jar.  
  
Navi (muffled): HEY LISTEN WATCH OUT HEY LISTEN WATCH OUT  
  
Did I mention it was a soundproof marmalade jar?  
  
Navi: ...  
  
Pika-chan: *grab maralade jar and sticks it in his equipment belt*  
  
Moogles: *yelling* DID YOU BRING KUPO NUTS? WE CRAZY FOR KUPO NUTS!  
  
*Navi-chan in jar starts bumping around and pika-chan let's her out*  
  
Squall:Not a good idea.......  
  
Navi-chan: HEY! LOOK! LISTEN! NOT I WOULD ADVISE GETTING THE HELL OUTTA HERE 'CAUSE WE DON'T HAVE ANY FRIGGIN' KUPO NUTS!  
  
Bon Jovi: For once I think she's right.....  
  
Suddenly, Britney Spears came running down the hill to see everyone standing there.  
  
Squall: You're late.  
  
Britney: Sorry! I forgot my makeup bag and had to run back and get it!!!!  
  
Everyone: *sweatdrop*  
  
Navi-chan: HEY! LOOK! LISTEN! *dodges Squall* Moogles! I think Britney has kupo nuts in her bouncy thingys!  
  
Moogles: REALLY!?!  
  
Nav-chan: YUP!  
  
Moogles: KUPO! *runs over to Britney tearing her apart looking for kupo nuts*  
  
Moogles: No kupo nuts, kupo. But we did find this fun red thingy that comes out of a tube! *holds up lipstick* I wonder how it tastes? *eats lipstick* Kupo...  
  
Bon Jovi: Oh dear....  
  
Squall: Hey! I've heard faeries have magic powers! May be Navi-chan *evil look*........  
  
Navi-chan: NNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 


	2. Holy water

Wow! 2nd chapter already? Oh yea! My friend Katie helped write this. Sorries Katie  
  
(several days after Navi-chan was forced to heal ALL the moogles, from the poisin lipstick)  
  
  
  
Squall: Okay, back to our quest...  
  
Navi-chan: HEY! LOOK! LISTEN! USE THE "PROGRESS" BUTTON TO FIND OUT WHERE WE SHOULD GO NEXT!  
  
Suddenly, the headless chicken comes up for the first time in the entire trip.  
  
Headless Chicken: ...  
  
Britney Spears: Uh... what's the porngress button?  
  
Everyone: *sweatdrop*  
  
Navi-chan:HEY! LOOK! DON'T LISTEN TO BRITNEY!  
  
headless Chicken: ...  
  
Pika-chan: *listening to headless chicken* Amen!  
  
Pikachu walks up to the mailman.  
  
Pikachu: Pika Pika!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Mailman: ?  
  
Pikachu: Pika Pika!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Mailman: What are you?! I must deliver my mail!  
  
Pikachu: Pika Pika!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Mailman: It is sunny outside.  
  
Pikachu: Pika Pika!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
(Pika-chan then talks to the mail man *again*)  
  
Pikachu: Pika Pi CHU!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Mailman: Don't you love writing letters? You can just see the face of the person you are writing too!  
  
Britney Spears: YES!!!! I LOVE writing letters!!! Take me home!  
  
Britney Spears jumps into the mailman's arms and they trot off happily.  
  
Bon Jovi: Well, that takes care of her, thank the Lord.  
  
Navi-chan: Ha ha ha...  
  
(As they slighter quieter groups started off they could hear the mailman yelling...)  
  
Mailman: Let's try to do our best, today!  
  
Squall: (snarling) I'll show you MY best, mister...  
  
Squall pulls out his gunblade.  
  
Navi: HEY!!! LISTEN!!!! Don't do that, you'll get arrested!  
  
Stu: There's no policeman here.  
  
Bon Jovi: Hey, there, youngen!!! Where'd you come from?  
  
Stu: I fell from the sky!  
  
Navi-chan: HEY! WATCH! LOOK! I CAN FALL OUT OF THE SKY TOO!!!!  
  
(Navi-chan flies up to the clouds and then stops swooshing her wings.) Navi- chan: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! CATCH ME PIKA-CHAN!!!!  
  
Pika-chan: *confluzzled* pi pika chu? *doesn't catch Navi-chan*  
  
Navi-chan:...*sweatdrop*...*BOOM!!!*...*owie*....  
  
Squall stuffs Navi into the marmalade jar again.  
  
Squall: That takes care of her. Now what were we doing again?  
  
Headless Chicken: ...  
  
Pika-chan: Pika! Chu Chu! Pi? *LOL*  
  
Headless chicken & Squall: ...........  
  
Navi-chan hasn't JUST figured out how to get out yet so she's trying the old way....pika-chan!  
  
Pikachu: I shocked me, pika.  
  
Navi: STUPID!!!!!!  
  
Fujin: Hey, only I'm supposed to say that!  
  
Bon Jovi: Hey, you're talking normal!  
  
Fujin: (shrugs) She - *points accusingly at Navi* - stole my line.  
  
Navi-chan: Well, HE is running out of time!  
  
Squall: What does that mean?  
  
Navi-chan: Well, since i'm the favorite of ONE (A/N: We know who the other's favorite is!) of the authors, I can ask to have someone *grins evilly*.....  
  
Fujin: What?  
  
Navi: *clock ticks menacingly at Fujin*  
  
Suddenly, Britney Spears comes running back again, looking extremely harassed. Naturally, no one pays any attention to her.  
  
Fujin: Wha...? CONFUSION!  
  
Squall: No way, you're not gonna...  
  
Navi: *nods*  
  
Britney Spears: Huh? What's she gonna do us? ARE WE ALL GONNA DIE????!!!! AAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!  
  
Headless Chicken:....  
  
Pikachu: *listening* ...amen...  
  
Navi-chan: ...No...I'm gonna....*Yells*...DO THE CHICKEN DANCE!!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!! 


End file.
